Friday, January 21, 2011

Police Report

Javeed,  our driver,  and I filed a police report at the local police station.  Once the sub-inspector and detectives heard our complaint,  they left us for a few minutes to shuffle some paperwork.  Javeed leaned over and calmly said,  “Now they will arrest Sudha (our maid),  throw her in Jail and beat her with a ruler.”  
The burly Sub Inspector of Bangalore.
His detectives have even bigger mustaches.

In retrospect I might have asked,  “Just how big is the ruler?”  At the time, I was caught off guard.  In the US,  these detectives would  have been the starting linebackers on any high school football team.   By contrast,  most Indian folks make a good horse jockey.  These detectives were not selected just for their brains.   I had to make it very clear that I didn’t want any human rights violations just because we're missing some jewelry.  After all,  we weren’t positive if it was Sudha or the electricians who stole Becky’s ring and necklace.   In any event,  we were told that getting the the police involved often makes the goods “reappear”. 
The detectives loaded into our car and came back to the house.  The crime scene was thoroughly inspected for evidence.   We retired to the living room and Sudha made us some tea.  She espoused innocence as they politely questioned her.   I tried to offer the Detectives a few hundred rupees for their trouble,  but they refused.  (I was later told they didn’t want to take money from a foreigner because if the jewelry did “reappear”,  I’d want the money back.  They would have taken a good bottle of wine though.)
The very next morning,  some missing cosmetics returned.  They had been used by someone with a much darker complexion than Becky.  We thought,  “The Police scared Sudha.  She returned it.  Doesn’t mean she took the jewelry,  but maybe something else will show up.”  That’s all that showed -- until Christmas time.   Sudha told us she had a dream the necklace was returned.  Three days later,  Becky found it in her purse.  We are very thankful she returned it and will allow extra credit for the foreshadowing,  but could you be more stupid ? A couple days later,  we discovered $120 missing from my mother-in-law’s purse.  
Sudha: looking for new work

Now I have to make my bed and my own dinner.  Lucky for the family,  I have mastered 5 different meals : grilled chicken,  grilled burgers, hamburger helper, leftovers and frozen leftovers from when we had a cook.  I give it 3 weeks before I’m sacked.